Get Outta Your &*$! Car

Get Outta Your &*$! Car

So this is my 100th post and it’s supposed to be some huge monumental earth-shattering, a-ha moment for you my faithful readers. Well it’s time for you to get over that fantasy real quick because this isn’t even going to be an original idea. Here’s the
original concept.

So my message today is for all you lazy arse, single, able-bodied individuals who were clogging up the freaking drive thru at McDonald’s at 9:45 this morning. Get out of your freaking car so that mommies like me with two little kids and a raging headache can get their iced vanilla coffee and hit the road to the commissary.

You see we live in a community of about 15,000 people. There is one McDonald’s and not a Starbucks in sight. So when I need a coffee fix, I am really limited in my choices. Today this was especially true. If we were going “to town” we would have been fine because there is a Starbucks about 11 miles south of our house. But today we were going on base, so we were going about 20 miles east of our house. There was no way to justify hopping on the freeway for 11 miles only to backtrack up to our house and head out to the base. So I was screwed basically by the lazy, inconsiderate boobs that were too lame to get out of their cars.

For the entire 20-ish miles to base, the Big One kept asking about why we turned around and left McDonald’s without my coffee. I tried to explain to her three-year-old brain that I was not waiting behind six cars for my coffee (and blocking traffic in the parking lot). And that mommy would just have a headache the rest of the day because of it. Of course this just brought about more questions: What is lazy? Why do you have a headache? Why didn’t you get coffee? Why don’t we go to Starbucks? Starbucks has apple juice for me! Did you want coffee, mommy? And on and on and on, like only a three-year-old can do.

I figured if we suffered through the commissary I would stop on the way back home and get one. Then when we left the commissary I notice a picture beckoning to me. The Burger King on base had a big picture of the “BK Joe Mocha” on the widow. I thought well lookie there, a sign. I guess I better try it.

Just so you know it’s not worth it. I am not a Burger King fan to begin with and now this “mocha” has solidified my distaste for the BK. It seriously tasted like chocolate milk. Now I like chocolate milk alright, but I was expecting that lovely bitter coffee aftertaste and was sorely disappointed with my choice.

So not only am I not ticked off at the people in my community, I am cursing the Air Force for contracting with Burger King. {The Navy contracts with McDonald’s so every Navy or Marine base will have the goodness that is McD’s, while us AF people are stuck with the nastiness that is Burger King}.

For those of you with many a McDonald’s to choose from, thank your lucky stars today and have an iced vanilla coffee for me to celebrate my 100th post.