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Guilt, Overwhelmed, Inadequate…

February 14, 2012

What in the world is going on with me today? Today is Valentine’s Day and my kids took crappy little Dollar Tree Valentines to school for their classmates.  The kids didn’t think they were crappy or cheap. They were thrilled to have Hello Kitty tattoos and princess stickers, so why is it bothering me so much that I didn’t “do” anything special for them to share today?


I am not one to get caught up in mommy comparisons or guilt over not doing enough. I do the best that I can and hope and pray the rest takes care of itself. My girls are happy, healthy, well-adjusted and fairly typical I think. The Husband and I are doing a fine job.


So why today am I feeling guilty for not making something cool for them to take for Valentine’s Day? This is the dumbest thing ever. I have laundry to do. I have homework to work on. I have dishes to put away. There is dusting that needs to be done. The floors need to be vacuumed and yet I feel this overwhelming need to cover some Oreos in chocolate or make some caramel twisted chocolate covered pretzels.  For what? To show that I am crafty or creative? To show that I don’t just sit around all day? Anyone who knows me, I think, knows I don’t sit around watching TV, eating bon-bons all day, so why do I care what The Big One’s teachers or classmates think of the crappy Valentines I sent her to school with? Why was I embarrassed as the Little One put a tiny Ziploc bag of Valentines in the box with all the other Valentine’s that the other kids brought in?   This is just dumb.  I don’t like feeling this way.


I hope that I can curb my desire to make something and take it to school later. I truly don’t have the extra time. And I would imagine the teachers and other kids parents won’t even notice that my kids didn’t bring in a special home-made treat.  I am fairly certain they are not thinking, “she stays home all day and this is the best she can do for Valentine’s Day?” I need to figure out a way to cut myself some slack!  I don’t like feeling this way.


Instead let me show you what we’ve made in years past, somehow this justifies my being so lame this year!

Heart Crayons

Chocolate lollipops with cool Valentines.

White chocolate cups filled with heart candies

4 Comments leave one →
  1. February 14, 2012 11:32 am

    “And I would imagine the teachers and other kids parents won’t even notice that my kids didn’t bring in a special home-made treat.” is exactly what I told myself as my kids frantically addressed their valentines before their classes this morning that Tony bought at 10:30 last night at Walmart. I don’t have any cool ones to show for previous years either, and I got down about it every year because I always *wanted* to do something – but this year I think I’m finally over it. Just too much other stuff going on to worry about a Hallmark holiday 😉

  2. February 14, 2012 11:55 am

    You’re a great mom, Joyce! Treats and goodies don’t make you more or less so, that’s just what you do for them when you have the time. They know you love them and that’s what Valentine’s day, and every day is about really. Give yourself a break and hug your kids extra tight when they get home. 🙂

  3. Laura permalink
    February 14, 2012 4:19 pm

    Dearest Joycie, allow me to share…

    Christopher’s school is closed all week (furlough days), and so they, very logically, celebrated Valentine’s Day on Friday. They sent home a note, I was aware of this…

    And then on Friday, he came home with a big pink envelope of valentines…

    Me – What is that?
    Him – My valentines.
    Me – From where?
    Him – My friends at school
    Me – What?!!?!?
    Him – We did valentines today.
    Me – You did?!??!??!
    Him – Uh huh.
    Me – Oh no honey! I am so sorry! We didn’t do yours!
    Him – Can I eat this piece?

    Note that his comments were completely without emotion or concern. He got valentines, got candy, etc. He was happy. I’m actually not sure it occurred to him that he was supposed to bring anything…(even though everyone else did).

    So there you go. At least you sent something, and aren’t the awful mom who sent her kid to school to get candy and cards from everyone else, bringing nothing to share!

  4. Christy permalink
    February 17, 2012 11:25 am

    We selected standard Valentine’s cards and I had my son write his name on them for his 4K class. They also had a party and we were signed up to bring fruit so he asked for watermelon and we used cookie cutters to make it into heart shapes. At the party, there was way too much food for them to eat (24 kids bringing snacks) so much of it ended up going straight in the trash. When we got home and opened his Valentine bag, there was so much candy in it, I think only one other parent did the standard Valentine card. It was too much, in my opinion, but I still felt bad that I hadn’t attached some sort of treat like most of the others had.

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