Two-Year-Olds and Potty Humor

The Big One is in no way, shape or form potty trained. In fact she is pretty much freaked out by the concept of sitting on the potty. Yes she is aware of when she is going because she will tell us point blank, “Mommy, I goin’ pee-pee,” or the more blunt, “Mommy, I poopin’.” But when it comes to doing the deed anywhere other than a diaper she wants nothing to do with it.

So the other night she was in the bathtub with her sister, as usual. We have those foam letters that float and stick to the tub walls that they play with. They are great for helping Allison learn her letters and they are good teethers for the Little One.

The Husband got the Little One out of the tub and was getting her jammies on and putting her down to sleep while I finished up the Big One’s tubby-time. As time neared for the Big One to get out I gave her the two minute warning and asked her to start cleaning up the letters and other toys.

She willingly obliged and thought she was done when the letter “P” was the only thing left in the tub. So the conversation went something like this:

ME: “Big One, you missed the ‘P’”

Big One: “NO! I didn’t pee!”

ME: “Big One, the yellow “P” is still floating in the tubby.”

{Disclaimer: yes, the “P” is yellow and on this particular evening Allison got to pick a color for the tubby. We have those Crayola bath fizzy things that change the water colors. On this particular evening she picked….. yes, you guessed it yellow. So she is sitting in yellow water.}

Big One: “There no pee in the tubby”

ME: “Big One the letter “P” is floating in the tubby still, you need to put it away.”

Big One: ~ scooping up a hand full of water~ “Mommy there no pee in the tubby.”

At this point the Husband finished with the Little One and comes in to check on us. Upon hearing the conversation and recognizing the irony of the water color he starts laughing. Now for anyone who has ever been around a two-year-old laughing means encouragement, so the conversation continued.

ME: “Big One, please pick up the letter “P” and put it away.”

Big One: “Mommy did you pee in the tubby?”

ME: “No Big One, mommy is not in the tubby and besides, mommy pees on the potty like a big girl.”

Big One: “I pee in my diaper.”

ME: “Yes, Big One you pee in your diaper. Please put the “P” away.”

Big One: “If I pee on the potty, I get a M&M and a Dora sticker.”

ME: “Yes, if you pee on the potty you do get an M&M and a sticker. But right now you need to put the “P” away..

Big One: “There is no pee in the tubby. I didn’t pee!”

ME: “Big One the “P” is behind your back, please pick it up and put it away.”

Big One: ~ Grabbing her behind~ “Mommy is there pee in the tubby?”

UGH! Yes, I finally gave in picked up the “P”, handed it to Big One and told her to put it away.

Big One: “Mommy, there the “P”… for PAPA and Pizza!!”

Ahhhhhh, the great joys. At least she recognizes the letter “P”.